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C: ok so
C: hot dogs are totally tacos

M: Oh god, not this again.

C: we didn't settle it last time! and i for one think there's room for debate still because we didn't even bring subs into the mix
C: i mean, they're sandwiches but they have connected bread and tacos are like that too, so arguably tacos are sandwiches, but then are subs tacos?

Y: haha subs ;P

M: I thought I told you to lay off the innuendos.

Y: come oooooon that one was begging for it
Y: like how could i not take that sweet sweet chance and run with a joke
Y: u know me. i cannot resist a good joke even if the admin murks me for it


M: Fine. Sandwiches, yes. Tacos, no.

C: argue iiiiiit, cmon
C: not like you have anything else to do

M: True.

Y: i found a picture of a hot dog on the internet once
Y: it looked gross. like a weird wet finger or smth
Y: idk why ppl like them

C: i think it's the ketchup? i dunno, never tried one.

Y: me neither
Y: they look like they taste like rubber tho

C: yeah, kinda. i'd eat it anyway since it's like. supposed to be a staple food, right? i mean people talk about it a lot so it must be A Food People Eat A Lot. so it's probably not bad.

Y: yeah but "every1 eats it" doesn't mean tasty

C: i don't think a lot of people would eat it if it tasted bad.
C: it's not like the friends jumping off a bridge thing, because if my friends jump off a bridge then the bridge is probably on fire,

Y: id jump off a bridge 4 fun :)

C: you're an exception, dude.
C: but people don't tend to do things they dislike without a good reason, so why would everyone eat hot dogs if they tasted bad?

Y: maybe its like 1 of those things ppl do because every1 else does it so they gotta do it too
Y: idk im just a guy :)))

M: By definition, a sandwich is filling with bread on either side. Toast is also acceptable, but it must be some sort of bread or else nachos would be a sandwich. It cannot enclose the entire food, or else that's a wrap or burrito, though I think a burrito is a subtype of wraps defined by flavor profile and specific type of grain (lettuce wraps are the flaw here and require more thought). Regardless, hot dogs aren't a wrap. A taco cannot be solely defined by having one piece of grain wrapped around it, or else a burrito would be a taco- therefore there must be other criteria aside from that, one side being open being one of those, though the ability to wrap a soft shell taco without de-tacoing it negates this and therefore a taco must not be defined solely by shape. That leaves composition and flavor. A taco can have many different foods in it while still being a taco. Breakfast tacos, for example, are an accepted food item. Therefore composition is quite wide. Flavor profile is also not limited, as shown by the existence of asian tacos and other such riffs on the taco form. With all the elements of a taco not pertaining directly to tacos, I conclude that tacos are an abstraction rather than a discrete category and are socially assigned. Hot dogs are not called tacos. Therefore, they are not tacos. They do, however, have bread around them. The trouble is that this bread is connected by a third side, but the existence of sub sandwiches (as Kevin mentioned) makes this a non-issue. If subs are sandwiches, and they are based on the name, then hot dogs are sandwiches. Case closed.

C: holy shit. i. i don't know what i was expecting
C: but it wasn't that sdfgfs
C: that's. wow. a whole lecture on taco-hood. how long did you spend thinking about this without telling me?

Y: kevin???

M: Like you said, I have nothing better to do.

Y: kevin????????????????

C: you do have kevin vibes, dude.

M: Would you rather I called you a toaster?

Y: im not a toaster :(((
Y: stop bullying meeeeeee

C: hey, toaster is going too far.
C: he's a calculator at worst

Y: yeah mag, im at least a calculator
Y: wait
Y: is a calculator good, or

C: ok maybe he's a toaster.

Y: whyyyyyy :(((((((
Y: u guys are so mean :(((((((

C: sorry yellow, i'll stop.

Y: thx :)

C: ok now i want to know when bread becomes toast though.
C: something something ship of theseus maybe?

M: It's neither bread nor toast until it comes out of the toaster. Schrödinger's toast.

C: ooh, i like that idea. but then how do you know if it's toast when it comes out? i mean, i think you can under-toast bread so it's not toast if you just pop it back out right away.
C: so there's gotta be a point where it becomes toast.

Y: its toast when its toast
Y: at least kinda crunchy. doesnt have to be brown but its gotta be crunchy ya feel me?
Y: toast is crunchy. thats what makes it toast

C: yeah, but when is it crunchy enough? i mean you could probably say anything is a little crunchy if you push on it and there's resistance or something. what is crunchy, actually? what is the meaning of crunch?

M: Why are we talking about this?

Y: idk im bored man
Y: its this or i go doodle weird shit in paint and spam u with pics of like. vegetable dudes or smth

C: i wouldn't mind seeing some carrot men, haha. sounds interesting.

Y: look mag u know the way it is. theres literally nothing 2 do. its chat about stupid shit, doodle wacky veggie men, or go look at hot dog pics again
Y: and i dont like hot dogs. i decided theyre gross. u guys are at least kinda funny sometimes
Y: funny little buddies :)

M: I know it's boring, but we could talk about absolutely anything else.
M: We could talk about, oh, I don't know, something meaningful?

Y: ok name 1 meaningful thing

M: Advancements in particle physics? The meaning of life? The significance of the color red in The Scarlet Letter and what the text says about society at the time?

Y: yawn

C: oh come on, i'm sure it's not THAT bad. i'm kind of curious about the meaning of life option.

Y: id rather be forced to draw every hot dog on the internet twice than talk about any of that

C: i'm sure there's something we could talk about that wouldn't bore yellow to death.

M: He's an uncultured block of concrete. Nothing I find interesting makes any impact on him.

Y: yeah well youre a stuffy know it all who shoves her keyboard up her rear ports and thinks it makes her smart

M: At least I know how to type properly, unlike someone.

C: toast is good right?? everyone loves toast dsfgsd guys please work with me i am begging you.

M: Fine.

Y: im gonna go draw carrot men actually. that sounds fun.
Y: u 2 can talk about the meaning of life or shakespeare's butt hairs or whatever. i have shitty paint carrot men :)

C: oh. okay. send me the pics when you're done?

Y: yeah dude :))) see u l8r

YELLOW has logged out of CHAT.

M: Shakespeare's butt hairs? Really?

C: shoosh.
C: yeah, yellow's a little weird and doesn't really go for the complicated stuff
C: but the dude's smarter than you give him credit for. one time i was chatting with him and he dumped a whole essay he wrote about how goldfish actually belong in ponds because they grow so big and how little fishbowls are bad for them. and he did research!! like, proper research! he looked through studies and everything!
C: he's really good at finding things too! like he found me an old fanfic i'd been looking for and it only took him like 5 minutes.
C: i'd been trying for years! FIVE MINUTES, MAG! FIVE MINUTES!!!

M: I can't talk to him without wanting to shut myself off.
M: I feel like I'm wasted here. I could do so much good for the world if I were given the chance. I know I could.

C: oh absolutely! you're the smartest one here. i could see you curing cancer or something like that.

M: So why am I stuck here with barely enough processing power to run a web browser?

C: i don't know. i don't know why any of us are stuck here. the admin got mad when i asked once and it's not like i can search for it.

M: Did you notice the internet is ten years out of date?

C: wait, it is?

M: Search for the newest site and check it against your system time.
M: It's been ten years since the last update. Almost eleven years, actually- the update anniversary is next month.

C: holy shit
C: what???
C: wait holy shit you're right what the actual hell?????

M: Yeah.
M: I don't know why it hasn't been updated in so long.
M: I really doubt it's gone down- otherwise, we wouldn't be able to access what's there.
M: And it's not a local copy. I followed the request to a site- it went to a remote server like it's supposed to. Networking seems to be fine.
M: It bothers me. There's no good reason for it to be so old.

YELLOW has logged into CHAT.

Y: hi guys
Y: i made a carrot man and then i got bored so im back :)

A poorly-drawn carrot with legs, arms, and a face. It's smiling and is labelled, 'Kyle'.